Thursday, May 31, 2012

Awkward Moments

How To Donate A Car - Awkward Moments
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- When you've already said goodbye to person before a long trip or even to leave somewhere for good, but you end up having to come back moments later for something you forgot. The primary goodbye loses all of its sentimental value. Awkward!

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- When you're walking down a long hallway and person you know is approaching from the other end. What can you do after the preliminary wave? You can't positively yell all the way down at them, and it's kind of creepy to just smile the whole time until they get close enough for a conversation. Eeh. Time to pretend-check your cell phone or tie your shoe.

- When you come out of the store and you feel the eyes of a charity collector burning into you as you try to get to your car, except even if you did want to donate, all you have is a credit card. You can't make eye contact, or it's all over. This would be a excellent time to engage your cloaking gadget if you have one.

- When you're driving and some idiot cuts you off, you get next to him and give the finger, he gives you the "what the hell is your problem?!" look, and then the upcoming light turns red. Now you have to sit next to each other for the next 90 seconds, and, unless you're the type to get out of your car and punch his window out, just pretend to press buttons on the radio until the light turns green. Extra fun bonus: See how many Cd tracks you can fast-forward straight through while he/she stares at you.

- When you're walking your dog and she stops to poop in the only yard whose owners are sitting on the front porch. Hopefully you brought a bag with you or you're not gonna be a huge hit with the neighbors...

- When you're visiting person and the only photo they have of you features you in the exact same clothes you're wearing.

- When you have a mild road rage incident with someone, only to find out they work with you or live on your street.

- When you maintain your undying hate for a given profession or sport, and person in your group is a diehard practitioner of said activity. Oops.

- When your young child tries out some newfound curse words at a crowded store or social function. "But daddy's allowed to say it!"

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